Genius or Junk?

There were times, during Delora's recent visit to the Marqués de Riscal Winery in the Rioja region of Spain, when she thought that the inn, designed by Frank O. Geary, was pure genius.  The way that the undulating metal panels reflected the sun, and the pale purple, gold and silver hues echoed the colors of the wine and the packaging was inspiring.

Then again, there were times, when Delora caught a glimpse of this same genius out of the corner of her eye and thought:  Damn if that doesn't look like a treehouse that some red-neck neighbor banged together for his kid.

Delora's Communicative Family

 coutesy of: This isn't Happiness blog

Delora has a very large and complicated immediate family.  First, there was Delora, her sister and her brother.  Then Delora's mother pulled a Brady Bunch move and Delora instantly acquired four additional brothers.  Then, Delora's father had two more children with his second wife.  Then many of the siblings got married to great people who became sibling-ish.  Now, Delora can barely swing a cat without hitting one of them.  But because Delora's many, many parents and siblings have very busy lives and are spread across the globe, they frequently have trouble keeping up to date with accurate news of one another.

Even when Delora tries to communicate en masse with these siblings and parents via a blog, her life is like a game of TELEPHONE. Below is an actual conversation that Delora had yesterday:

Delora's Mother:  How is your hernia?

Delora(patiently): Mom, why do you think I have a hernia?

Delora's Mother: I read it on your blog.

Delora: You must not have read the actual blog.

Delora's Mother: No, really, I did!  I read that you had a hernia! How is it?

Delora:  Mom, if you'd read the actual blog, you would have known that that was a joke.  It was a lead into another issue...

Delora's Mother: -silence-

Delora: I don't have a hernia, Mom.

Delora's Mother:  Oh, that's right!  Your brother told me that you had a hernia!  He says he's going to call you about it...

Here's the story of Delora's hernia, Delora's BLOOD BROTHER and Delora's BLOOD MOTHER...
  Delora's Hernia

Delora's Brain Malfunction

Multiple Shadow House photo by Olafur Eliasson

Delora discovers a seriously, serious problem with her brain function while driving with friends to a cute little village north of Madrid called Patones.

Delora is having a discussion about travel advisories in foreign countries and how one little incident can trigger a warning from the U.S. State Department.  Delora decides to delight her friends with an example of this by telling a story about a guy she knows who ran a travel business in Africa. Delora recounts the story of how one day this friend was traveling with his clients in this African country when they came upon a group of poachers. (All true.) They stopped the bus, and the men with guns fired a warning shot outside the window of the bus and it inadvertently hit a woman inside the bus and killed her.

Like in Babylon, Delora's friend asks?

Delora continues telling her riveting story, while at the same time thinking, Babylon, Africa? She refuses to embarrass her friend regarding her faulty geography, because she is concentrating so hard that she can see the story while she's telling it!  She recreates the dusty bus in her mind's eye and sees the woman who's been shot and the man next to her, who looks alot like -- wait a minute -- Brad Pitt! Sitting right next to the woman from Southport, Connecticut?

Sensing Delora's confusion, the friend gently utters the word, Babylon, and Delora's realizes that her brain is now mixing reality with scenes from movies!

Delora and her friends laugh uproariously until the windows fog on the car. But when Delora is awake playing Sudoku in the middle of the night, she wonders about the tiny brain tumor that may be forming and causing her to break from reality.  Maybe that Jamon isn't as full of Omega three fatty acids as those farmers claim it to be!  What if there's a miniature fat-ball restricting blood flow to the region of the brain that distinguishes between film clips and reality?  Delora decides that she must be very careful about which movies she chooses to view from now on.  Nothing funky from the science fiction or horror genres.  After all, Delora must keep her wits about her.  Tomorrow, she has to stand on a balcony in Buenos Aires and sing, "Don't Cry for Me Argentina", while looking good for her husband, Antonio Banderas.

Delora Lapses Into Semi-retirement

Delora's scoops another handful of Iberian jamon (de bellota) into her pie-hole, and glances lazily at her computer screen. There it is, the proof she was looking for: only 7 posts in the month of February. (The short, short month of February, she reminds herself.)  

Delora finishes chewing and tries to recall the quote from the author who wisely stated that one must balance living life with time spent writing about it. Working hard to source the quote for several minutes without any luck, Delora enjoys a dessert of Sour Cream and Onion chips while contemplating. Whoever that writer was sure knew what he was talking about. Without experiences, the writing suffers. Then again, Delora admits, with too many experiences one can't even make it to the computer. Delora is a bit torn,until her Spanish teacher warns her harshly never to feel guilty about not working hard enough. After all, she says, tomorrow you may be forced to face something really bad. Why not enjoy today?

Thinking back to when she was a New York tri-state-area-type-A personality, Delora realizes that after 6 months in Spain, her personality is now more like a type J (for Jamon). Delora chuckles to herself  remembering the self help books stacked on her bedside in Connecticut: Eckhart Tolle's, The Power of Now, and his follow up book, Practicing The Power of  Now. Delora was always too busy reliving the past or fretting about the future to read them.  Now Delora internalizes the Spanish philosophies of: no pasa nada and manana, tranquila! (Roughly: Don't worry; there's always tomorrow.)  And by doing this, Delora has achieved a goal more amazing, more unthinkable for a tri-state-type-A than any marathon or nobel prize: She has enjoyed a 4 hour lunch! She has actually wondered, after 4 hours of eating and drinking: where has the time gone? She has thoroughly enjoyed a lunch with 2 other people that lasted longer than her wedding reception!

Now many tomorrows have passed and Delora takes a vow: she will not, under any circumstances, enjoy Spain as much as she has been. She will limit her visits to the Rioja region of the country, minimize time spent enjoying her new friends, the museums, and the city sites.  She will restrict her time spent enjoying the radiant (yet, sometimes rebellious) personalities of her teenaged children and her newly Spanish speaking husband.  Instead, she will focus a tiny bit more on productivity! She will strive to post half of what normal bloggers post --a minimum of 10 posts per month!

And with that vow made, Delora decides to bypass the gym today.  One vow for greater productivity will count as mental exercise.  No pasa nada.

BTW - Delora apologizes for the programmers at Blogger.com for the horrible way that their program is formatting today...

Learning Manners From The Spaniards

Unlike those from a bordering country (rhymes with "pants"),  the Spanish always make you feel as though you've made their day just by being their country.  You go to Pants and, unless you're down on one knee apologizing for the Bush years, your attempts at speaking the language are met with a sniffle and a sneer.  You come to Spain and you're greeted with a kiss on both cheeks, a platter of Iberian ham, personal Spanish lessons and a hand-written thank you note for entering the country.  There's no comparison.

Turns out, the way Spaniards treat Americans is pretty much the same way Spaniards treat each other. Great emphasis is put on spending lots of time with family and friends and on being nice to strangers.  Here are a couple tips on Spanish etiquette for your next visit:

Always greet people on elevators... 
When entering or exiting an elevator, always greet the other elevator dwellers by saying Buenas dias! or Hola! (good day or hello). Say Hasta luego! (see you later) when getting off the elevator.  Don't make the same mistake Delora has made for months by saying Adios! when exiting. Saying Adios! implies that you don't expect to see your new elevator friends again and that's rude! Who knows when you might enjoy another few seconds with that same person on another elevator ride?

And at neighboring tables at restaurants.
Next time you're at a restaurant, ask yourself this question: am I being rude to the other diners? How many times have you followed the hostess to your table and avoided eye contact with others? Not here!  In Spain, you greet the people you pass while walking to your table at a restaurant.  Delora has noticed this mannerism mostly in smaller Spanish villages, but she plans to try this in New York City and see how it works there.  Try it yourself: enter a restaurant, give your name to the hostess, then nod at every person you pass and say, Hola! and Buenas! all the way to your seat.  Kind of makes you feel like the Mayor of the city.

Group singing - a must!
When our three returned from Spanish immersion camp this summer, they told stories of kids singing everywhere they went. Whether riding in buses or walking to the beach, group singing is always encouraged.  Camp life is a real-life version of High School Musical. The popular song by Pitbull, I Know You Want Me, made it impossible to mutter the words: one, two, three, four, last summer without every camper hoping onto a picnic table to finish the song: Uno, dos, tres, cuatro! We dismissed this behavior as child's play until we boarded a bus in Tenerife at 11:30PM and listened to 50 grown Spaniards sing for the full bus ride.  Or,  try a spinning class where you can enjoy group singing while getting exercise at the same time. What better way to make new friends?

When leaving a party, say goodbye to everyone.
Well-mannered Americans thank their hostess when leaving a party, but Spaniards say goodbye to all the guests too.  It's not mandatory to kiss everyone goodbye, but if you are too hasty with your exit, people will talk.

Attend the after-party.
It's only steps away from the party or the function you attended...it's right outside the party, in the street.  There, you'll have another opportunity to say goodbye to everyone and to chat a little bit more about whatever you just did. Are you starting to see why the Spaniards are famous for staying out all night?

If you come to Madrid and don't follow these suggestions, be forewarned.  The Spanish have a way of describing people who leave parties without saying goodbye properly -- Despiderse a la Francesa
(leaving like the French).